An excerpt from my script review for Skyscraper which will be available 07/16/18:
2.) Plot Stability
Setting up and using payoffs.
This script did an excellent job setting up a cutting edge building of the future right out of SimCity 2000. (Anyone else remember arcologies and how they progressed from “Blade Runner” style to “EPCOT Center”?)
There were features to the building that were both “nextgen” and interesting, most of which paid off later and not mentioned for the sake of a “one and done”.
The mag lift elevators…The Rock mentions them while traveling to see Zhao, explaining how they’ll work.
Later, his wife and son need to use them…
The fire suppression system that keeps fires contained to a single floor, saving the rest of the structure. Smart, right? Until the bad guys take control, opening up all the vents…
A 3,000 foot building constructed entirely of glass. Beautiful…until you have a gunfight at the top, and you’re getting massive wind that will sweep you off your feet and to your death!
All of these payoffs are good, showing us something cool, and then incorporating it into the script later as either an escape or a hurdle.
The one that wasn’t…and is a GLARING issue?
The “Heaven’s Walkway” at the very top.
The light hit’s the top of the tower in just the right way, and somehow all of the glass joints become invisible, making you feel like you’re standing on thin air.
Really cool scene with a cheesy line that works for this actor’s type of film.
But it’s never used again!
You set your FINAL confrontation with the bad guy on it and don’t make use of it?
I mean, I get that it’s night time, but the fire or an explosion can’t magically happen causing this walkway to disappear, throwing an unexpected curve to some of the characters?
Shit, at one point, The Rock shoots out part of the walkway…what BETTER time to make use of it than have the bad guy fall to his death, and now The Rock and Georgia aren’t sure where there is or isn’t a path!!!
Talk about edge of your seat kind of shit…wind whipping around them, fire raging below, three thousand foot plummet to their deaths a likely possibility…
My point here is make use of the cool things you’re setting up in your story.
Don’t mention a cool feature for the sake of solely impressing your audience.
This is the type of stuff that distinguishes a well written spec script from someone’s first attempt.
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