An excerpt from Reals’ script review for Saw which will be available 09/05/22:
What Needed Work
Chunks of Description – Now, this was written years and years ago, but I do think it’s important to note that the script got to 95 pages by smashing all of its action / description sections into big chunky paragraphs.
Don’t do this – it will make a reader skim or put the project aside, which you really don’t want.
Cheating On “Contained” – In the same way that the recent film/script Bullet Train was “technically” a contained script (review HERE), this script is “technically” a contained script… except for all of the scenes and action that take place outside of the bathroom.
My point is that you are not doing yourself (or your producer) any favors by pitching a script as one-location or contained if most of the plot happens outside of one or two main locations.
Bigger Role For Amanda – Now, this is looking ahead in terms of the Saw franchise, but Amanda, the player who is stuck in the infamous “reverse bear trap” should have been given one more scene or something more to do that hinted that she had some strange devotion to Jigsaw.
Her line: “I’m alive.” on Page 27 is creepy, but I would have liked a little something more, as she is introduced relatively early in the script and then forgotten about until Saw II.
SPOILER ALERT FOR THE SAW FRANCHISE
As many of you horror fans will know, Amanda becomes a big player and is actually one of Jigsaw’s (many) apprentices.
The Saw timeline has shifted so much recently that I do not, off the top of my head, remember if she was working for/with Jigsaw when she went in for her interview with Tapp.
I didn’t think she was working for Big J at this time, but I went on an odyssey to confirm… by that, I mean I checked out the Official Saw Wiki (HERE).
And, according to the experts, Amanda was not working for Jigsaw at the time of her police interview.
This may seem like a small detail to many of you readers, but it was bothering me and was something I know would have continued to bother me unless I looked it up.
Yes, I may be a little (or a lot) compulsive.
Too Many Traps – I think that one of the previous games shown early in the script could have been cut for budget and pacing reasons.
We didn’t need to see both of the flashback traps, as they don’t add anything more to the overall story, and we could easily have lost either Paul or Mark’s game.
For reference, these take place on Pages 20 – 24.
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