An excerpt from Reals’ unproduced script review for Batman: Year One by Frank Miller which will be available 04/03/18:
What Worked
Pg. 1 – White space. That’s always great to see and a good sign that this is going to be a tight, well-written story.
Pg. 3 – This won’t always work, but I like how Bruce simply responds with “I’m fine.” “They’re fine.” “I’m fine.” to Little Al’s questions. In my opinion, the personality of Bruce Wayne only really exists to give Batman a cover and a skin he can wear out into the world to make the arrangements that Batman will later need, so he would not naturally be a big conversationalist.
Pg. 4 – Man, this IS dark. Having Gordon be suicidal is an interesting take on the character.
Pg. 5 –
As Gordon leaves, he passes the door to the evidence room.
We catch a quick glimpse inside —
Two detective stuff YELLOW ENVELOPES and STACK BILLS
Before the door SLAMS shut.
This is nice – four short, to-the-point lines and we know that the cops (and maybe the whole city) are corrupt.
Pg. 6 – Jim Gordon not having kids in this is kind of a new take. Though this is early in Batman’s history, I still don’t think the timelines would match up even if Barbara (Batgirl) were to be born right now.
Pg. 7 – It’s only page 7, but I already like this version a lot and think it would have been really interesting if Nolan had taken this idea/this script as his Batman Begins. I love BB, but so far this is the really gritty, noir-take on the character that would fit very well in Nolan’s Universe and with the follow-up film, The Dark Knight.
Pg. 11 –
LITTLE AL
(Big Al) understood what happens to a man who’s SEEN too much of this world’s evil.
I like this THEME STATED line because it reads well as a quick wise-old-mentor line.
Pg. 22 – That’s a nice Harvey Dent cameo.
Pg. 39 – Gordon’s line here is awesome!
GORDON
I don’t like what passes for NORMAL in this town. CRIME is NORMAL in GOTHAM. CORRUPTION is NORMAL. The scum of this city have taken so much from us, our youth, our families. I’ve declared my WAR ON CRIME!
Pg. 36 – This is a nice description for an action beat —
There is no delay between cause and effect. The shove sparks an almost ORGASMIC release of RAW, PENT UP VIOLENCE from BRUCE.
Pg. 37 – Another nice description of action —
Bruce tears into the SKINHEADS with all the joy of a child at Christmas.
Pg. 66 – Study the action scenes here – they are quick, tight, and you can feel how visceral they are. There is lots of white space and your eyes dart down the page as you read.
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