An excerpt from my script review for Silk Road which will be available 03/22/21:
2.) Plot Stability
Simply put, it was a less fun version of Catch Me If You Can.
Now, that’s one of the boss and I’s favorite films, so the above line isn’t exactly a negative criticism.
What I did take issue with was just how “easy” everything seemed to work out.
Was it all true? Maybe, but parts felt really convenient.
For instance, the drugs are shipped through the US Postal Service.
With the frequency, especially out of Utah…how exactly?
There’s a scene where postal workers x-ray one of the packages, find the illegal drugs…and just throw it out, using the excuse that it’s too small a quantity?
Really? Increase in illegal drug packages wouldn’t warrant some sort of investigation?
Force versus Ross.
Force gets onto Ross just entirely too quick, I mean like page 38 of a 120 page script and the cop has already found the bad guy?
Imagine if Tom Hanks had arrested Leo in that hotel upon their initial meeting?
It wouldn’t have been as fun since the chase is what keeps us watching.
For Silk Road though, Force and Ross are practically email buddies, with Ross trusting the DEA officer pretty quick.
(We’re never given any background aside from an initial message from Force to buy the site which Ross refuses. Next exchange we witness is Ross asking Force to go interrogate Chronic Pain, Ross’s only employee.)
And then Chronic just scanning his ID for Ross…why?
You both sell illegal drugs! How is everyone so fucking trusting?!
Finally, what really bothered me, was the money Force leaves for Edie’s school.
How would his family be able to keep it? He was arrested.
The FBI and DEA aren’t going to wonder how Sandy can suddenly afford this $40k a year school?
There were just too many situations that required me to simply accept it so the plot could move on.
Don’t do this in your story.
If you’re writing this sort of crime thriller, check out this project, but then compare it to others like CMIYC.
Does your bad guy get caught too easy? Are there any consequences for their crimes? Near misses with the law?
Think of what you enjoy in a good thriller, and then implement similar techniques.
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