Finishing out the month!
(And don’t forget to check out Week 3!)
Apocalypse Clown – Not a horror film, I would say the title is a bit misleading, but I guess it did deliver what it promised, clowns in an apocalypse. I don’t really know what else to say about it. It was more of a comedy than anything else. It wasn’t gory or violent, but it had a few good laughs. One that stuck with me was when our lead, a down on his luck clown, asks a hot female reporter out on a date saying, “I know this great little Italian and he has a fantastic hotdog stand”. I’d give this a RENT.
It Lives Inside – This was an interesting one, I didn’t think too much about it when I watched the trailer, but it’s horror, so I figured I might as well put it on the list, not really expecting much from it. But I was pleasantly surprised by it. It’s kind of a mashup of a bunch of different things you’ve seen before, a little sprinkle of Evil Dead, some Ring a little bit of It Follows… All done pretty well. It wasn’t gory and the creature looked a lot like the one from the Animal Collective music video for Peacebone. I also didn’t care for the ending, it kind of does the power of friendship thing to defeat the monster, which is always stupid. I’ll give this one a solid RENT.
Don’t Look Away – I was going to possibly skip this one, the trailer made the movie look fake, like it was a spoof of these type of films but not an actual film. I was very surprised by this one. It’s super well directed with a clear style to it that sets it apart from most movies I’ve seen this month. It is kind of going for this 70’s maybe early 80’s style horror feel. It was low budget but knew how to use it, as it focuses a lot on the visual and the audio mixing, which is crucial for films like this when the only thing you see is a kind of silly looking mannequin just standing there. The only thing that gets in the way of this film is the acting and the dialogue. At times it feels almost purposely bad, like you’d find in a dubbed over Italian horror flick. If that was the goal, they nailed it. If not… This one is worth seeing, really well directed and cinematography. RENT.
Appendage – This was very interesting, as I thought it was just another crazy lady who turns out is crazy film, but she isn’t crazy. She actually birthed her evil twin from her side, and it actually took over her life. I mean, kudos for going for it. This was another Hulu exclusive and so far with The Mill, it’s pretty solid. It has a few twists and turns I didn’t expect from it. It also might be the only body horror film I’ve watched this month. I’ll say it’s worth a RENT.
Night of the Hunt – The film asks a bunch of questions and in the end answers absolutely none of them. Like why even bother with half the shit the killer spews? It means absolutely nothing in the end as we never do learn who the shooter is, what his motivations are, what his connections if any to our protagonist are. Nothing is answered. That’s really the film’s biggest issue. Everything else is setup really well, how you’d expect a single location film like this to be setup. The film throws a bunch of scenarios at you, but nothing sticks. It has some good kills, that are pretty graphic and messy I might add. This was a good watch; I’ll give it a RENT.
Five Nights at Freddy’s – This movie has been in development hell forever now, so long in fact Willy’s Wonderland came out with the same idea just a few years earlier. I wonder if that’s what made them pivot and change the story. Or it could just be this is based on a videogame, so they overcompensate with the story, filling it with unnecessary shit. A movie like this needs to be kept simple. I can see their thought process through the whole thing. We need to find a reason why this guy keeps coming back when deadly machines are walking about. So, they invented this backstory of a lost brother and this old pizza place having a connection to that. They ended up making an even dumber story than just security guard on duty with a bunch of killer animatronics on the loose. They have half a good idea when it comes to the story, that being a down on his luck mall security guard gets a gig guarding this rundown pizza place. It’s dangerous but the pay is good, and he needs to take care of his daughter. One, the pay is shit and why is it his sister, who he must be 20 or so years older than? Good pay, daughter in need, that’s all you really need for the character to keep coming back. They don’t even tell you the days in the film. It’s five nights and after each successful shift you get how many days are left. You know, like the title of the movie says! Nothing like that is used for the movie, you kind of just have to remember how many times our lead puts himself to sleep in his guard post to find his dead brother in his dreams. Yeah, they all but abandon anything from the game to give you this generic story about dead kids possessing the animatronics. The games are for kids, but what made them successful were the jumpscares and the movie can’t even do that right. There’s nothing even in the realm of scary in this movie. I think the only jumpscares, which are the cheapest and easiest scares there are, are only limited to this bobble head our lead keeps finding. There’s so much more to say about how bad this movie is, but I’d like to move on. HARD SKIP!
Suitable Flesh – I guess I get what they were going for here. It feels like a throwback to trashy 90’s softcore thrillers. Ever see Mercy? It felt a lot like that but written by H.P. Lovecraft. I felt myself dozing off while watching it. Stuff was happening, I just didn’t feel the need to care. It has a couple of gruesome kills, a decapitation, which might be the only one I’ve seen this month, and some light sexy time. One issue I had, the body switching takes forever, and it happens in a time of urgency, so when they’re just writhing on the floor, people watching could step in and try to do something. Mostly folks stand around and watch. This is a RENT.
When Evil Lurks – And finally, the one film of the month that makes going through piles of shit worth it. This is a possession movie and unlike Exorcist Believer, they did it right. This movie was fantastic, it’s brutal as hell, so prepare yourself if you’re going to watch it as everyone with Shudder should. They pretty much just dumped this thing on their site without warning. I love the world building, as it is basically people living in the end of times, but it takes place in this small farm town. People get possessed, almost pregnant with evil and if it gives birth, it’s like a supernatural demonic nuke that goes off. Usually, the state brings in a specialist to deal with the possessed person, but the idiot cops ignored it for a year, so the infected person is about to pop. The farmers decide to move the body but lose it in transit. That’s when the shit really hits the fan. There were several moments when I audibly gasped and let out a oh my god. There is a lot of shocking moments in this, moments I won’t spoil but really really want to. The only bad thing I have to say is the ending is pretty lackluster. They fumbled the ball at the last minute when everything leading up to it was so well done. However, I still say this is a must watch for Halloween. This is a SEE IT!
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