american-ultra-movie-reviewAn excerpt from The Captain’s movie review for American Ultra which will be available 8/30/15.

Will it be funny enough for his tastes?

Mike and Phoebe (Kristen Stewart’s character) are madly in love. They even have each other’s eyes tattooed on their ankles. Which is adorable. They plan on going to Hawaii for a much needed vacation, but Mike has anxiety issues leaving him with crippling panic attacks whenever he tries to leave town. Which sucks because it is ruining his plans to propose to her. There’s a funny running gag where he can never find the right time to pop the question. Even when people are exploding he’s wondering, is this the right time?

Meanwhile with the CIA!

Connie Britton, who is hot as hell by the way, plays Lasseter. She ran a special project called Wiseman. Turning folks faced with hard prison sentences into lethal killing machines. For reasons. Why not just take a soldier and run him through the same program? I guess that would be the same plot as The Bourne Identity. Which I guess is what those movies were about. Hate those films by the way.

The secret CIA Wiseman project for the most part failed, leaving Mike the only success story. But he kind of went insane and had to be reassigned with his handler Phoebe. Oh no! Spoilers!

Now for some reason Topher Grace’s character Yates has OK’d an operation to kill Mike. Not really sure why. He has his own project of killers called Tough Guys. Instead of using everyday people, he uses committed crazy people. One of which is Laugher played by Walton Goggins. AKA Boyd Crowder from Justified AKA the tranny Venus Van Dam from Sons of Anarchy and like a million other things. Most recently being in The Hateful Eight. See, it all comes back to The Hateful Eight.

If you know Boyd, you know he’s all teeth. Which is ironic seeing as the first thing Mike does is smash out all his front teeth with a pair of handcuffs for brass knuckles.

It’s weird because by the end you kind of feel sorry for the guy. After the dragout fight between these two leaves them both broken and bleeding, Laugher just smiles and says you’re like me. But you’re better. Laugher just liked to laugh and set things on fire. It was good to see him live at the end. Off setting fires somewhere or killing puppies. Whatever it is he likes to do.

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6 COMMENTS

    • Tim,

      Not to worry. Stay tuned as we generally do contests for free 6 mo. subscriptions. The last one was based on guest reviews where EVERYONE won.

      (There were only 4 or 5 entries.)

      Thanks,

      Hank

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